Let me help...

What is the most stressful time of your professional year?

Is it April and May, for all you bookkeepers and accountants?

Or June through October for the construction contractor.

Maybe its every couple weeks when payroll is due, or when you have to, must do this or that for a client and if you don't, well.....

Consider that time, thing, deal that takes all your concentration, and see the strain and worry of it reflected on the face of the highway worker who plowed your way to work, or school or possibly even hospital.

Know that he feels personally responsible for your safety, and that he would much rather be home, taking a snow day, sledding with his kids.

Will he make over the mountain one more, two more, four more times tonight without 'finding' the invisible edge of the road? Can he be gentle with his equipment, make it last long enough to get you and you kids where they need to be, or will it breakdown and lose him hours?

And what about those kids, driving way to fast and that road he just cleared, will they make another corner, another mile? Who will be there first to pull them from their car, to call for help.


Consider his family, who want to share their day, and be with him, and all he wants is to eat, shower and shut down. To wake up for the next shift to see that all his effort, skill and professionalism gained him nothing.

Four more inches of snow, freezing rain and a tricky commute.

Let me help, I'll go first, just give me room to work.



.

Wow

My friend buried his wife yesterday.

I hadn't much opportunity to ask him how he was doing, I was certain he was absolutely overwhelmed and I didn't want to add yet another "how you holdin' up?''

I do know that she is what stabilized him and brought him back to Christ. And I assumed with her being literally torn away he would be angry and defiant toward God.

I'm sure I would. And on both counts, I would be wrong.

Growing up, my friend was just enough younger than me, I always considered him and his wife "kids". I was his counselor and 'cabin dad' at summer camp. I watched him grow up, screw up, and mature. In fact the picture I used for my profile was taken from a softball game this summer where he hit 9 home runs. I remember thinking what a man he had become and of all it had took to get him there. It all looked good, babies, job, beautiful wife, the whole deal.

All I can say is she faced death on her (figurative) feet, had one week to bring closure to her life as a mother, wife and friend and demanded that no one cry for her. I watched him put his wife in a hearse, and then wrap his huge arms around his aunt, to comfort her.

God uses all things for good. That is His Way.

I wonder how, why, and ignorantly search for answers. And someday I may think I have the answers, and that I now I have understanding.

And on both counts, I'm sure I'll be wrong.



.

Still here

Dear Citizens, thank you for checking in, it has been too long since my last post and I feel I should DO SOMETHING. But I cant. I am too depressed over the death of my friends 28 year old wife and mother of his two way too young kids to be witty and charming. And I am too emotionally constipated to cry about it on the Blogosphere. I lost my mom when I was the age of his oldest and all I know for sure is that it is possible to continue breathing, walking and living, that one day will continue to follow another, whether he wishes to or not. If he loses faith, if he can no longer trust and believe in God thats ok- I'm certain God still believes in him.

Abject Apologies

I am so very sorry Citizens- I violated one of my arbitrary and self imposed rules and BITCHED ABOUT MY LIFE ON THE BLOG! (this is where I swear never to do it again, but We both know thats a lie)

Any how, Have I ever told you about this guy I know who prefaces every third ( or fourth) word with 'anyhow'? Absolutely charming man, comes from a family of timber barons who own millions of dollars worth of trees and acreage here and elsewhere. Anyhow, he's the black sheep of the family, and not to be stereotypical, but while the rest of his family live in typical miserly Scottish fashion, he is a bit more worldly and anyhow, when he recently go married, he decided to buy a new car to safely ensconce his growing family. Anyhow, his dad and mine used to cut timber together and it was never a surprise to see Dave on the front porch, waiting to hire Dad for some job. Dad calls Dave one time to share in salmon he had caught and anyhow, as Dave left his driveway he saw two of his sons, working on a gate. They asked him where he was goin and, anyhow, he replied "I think I'll go salmon fishing.'' So Dave comes back ten minutes later, after meeting Dad at the end of the lane, with this thirty pound salmon, and his boys see that fish and ol Steve just cant get over it! Steve's the one who wanted a real nice, dependable car for his wife and kids and anyhow he got a real good one, a buff colored 1984 Ford plumbers van with sliding side door and room in the back for a couple chain saw's, gas and a few spare tires. No wheels. Just the tires. Anyhow, Steve is cool, and he's been growing his beard for seventeen years!

Steve saves a lot of money every month by not having a car payment. So do I. And, most months I feel brilliant as I drive my bought and paid for transportation. Problem is, my car, that gets 35 miles to the gallon, (and that makes me happy) is broke down and in major pieces in my shop(not so happy). Engine out, transmission separated, and awaiting parts. This seems like a lot of work for two $22 parts. And it is. So when I get it all back together and I'm driving to work remember-don't laugh, it's paid for.

Drowning in a dry well

Ok- Ok! Got it! Miriam- leaving said political sign in place is 'right', insomuch as it is an extension of that citizens liberty in the area of self expression, wayward thought and the advertisement thereof.
However, if said sign was placed on the County Right of Way, ( and is contrary to your deeply held political convictions,(yes Mrs OFallon, that is oxymoronic, and yes I'm aware you can't begin a parenthetical thought without concluding the first) then please notify the proper authority to have it removed.
Forging onward, I must say that for someone who professes to love liberty and despises the encroachment of government, I should have lots to say about the most recent developments in our economic and political landscape. If the truth were told, I am quite certain that my positions would align nicely with yours, not in the preaching to the choir kind of way but in the I HAVE NO $%&@()&& CLUE WHAT IS GOING ON!!!!!!!!!!! and therefore your guess is literally as good as mine.
The Bible says that being double minded is like a 'ship tossed upon the waves, blown from place to place'. So rather than be blown from place to place, I have thrown out the anchor and feel like I'm riding this one out. I feel like we are being lied to. I have no trust in my government who would lead me, nor do I trust any information I can glean from the media who would mis lead me.
Besides, saturday ( aside from being a proper noun and deserving capitalization) is opening day of deer season for rifle hunters,and my son, Headstrong Boy will be participating in his first ever 'pack yer own gun, by gawd for real' hunt. You have been duly warned.
I am freaking out about this. I haven't filled a deer tag in 15 YEARS! My son thinks this is voluntary, some kind of self imposed penance. I really do like hunting, I just don't like getting up at o'dark thirty to do it. And then, when I do, STILL nothing, which makes the next predawn sojourn all the more difficult to justify.
No pressure.
Oh, yeah-my car is up on blocks 'cause I got to pull the engine, again, which just pisses me off and that's all I'm going to say about that.
AND, I started stacking the firewood for this winter for my mother and myself and I only have half of what I need.....
which makes me feel defeated
AND this very qualified and likable guy who has been with The Company for only two years (compared to my ten) is being promoted to a job similar to one that I was recently passed over for.....
which makes me feel irrelevant.
All these things and more have lead to preoccupation and sucked my will to blog.
I leave you with that Citizen, and thanks for sticking with me, I like to hear from you.

A Perfunctary Post

Hello Citizen, Thanks for your participation.

The title says it all, I am truly posting this for no good reason. No news to report, no grave infringements on Liberty, nothing but a sore back and aching limbs.


I could post a brilliant dissertation on last weekend, the weekend I had no time to blog because we had company. No friends like old friends I suppose, but I haven't seen or heard from CHW and Misty in so long I (15 years ), and I am acutely aware how much I have changed in that time, I can only imagine my old friends are not the folks I knew. True. But in a good way. (Yes Mrs. O'Fallon, I know you must not begin sentences with BUT,but...). Chw and Misty are wonderful, and I feel I have made new friends,at no expense to any old ones. I must say, however, if yur looking for brilliance and pictures and deep emotion relating to their visit, I suggest linking to Katies Calamities and Rainy day in May




On said weekend, I did see a sign, posted by our all Knowing, most Merciful Government stating that the area behind said sign was property of the U.S. Government and NO ENTRY WAS ALLOWED. I took pictures (to post ). I ranted. I Opined. CHW yawned. I felt like a bore and shut up about it. My point was to follow logic to it's conclusion, such as who is the government? Why its We The People! Who owned that land; Again, We the People! Who placed the sign? A government employee, acting in the interests of ( and paid by) The People! And now Citizen, guess who can no longer access aforementioned land? You guessed it!


Here's the Big Question...


How can a government of the People restrict the Liberty of the People?


Stupid question.



I think CHW grasped this right off and was being polite, letting me rant and vomit my hastily made and unsupported opinion (the sure sign of a true friend, I must say) . If you want a codified answer to this and many more stupid questions read Thomas Hobbe's essay 'On Commonwealth' and or John Locke's 'Man and the State'. Then, when you wake up from your literary induced coma, apply common sense and you will have it!



As for my general soreness, yesterday was a day of great accomplishment, attaining goals and manual labor.

Saw and split logs for winter firewood? Check. ( this is shameless use of literary device, thanks Misty)

Construct Chicken Coop for thirty hens and one Huge rooster? Check

Move twenty stinky Fryer chicks out of house into brooder? Check.


This morning, I'm beat, sore and precariously blogging on Agent K's time. Lots to do, wife to appease and children to instruct.


Think I'll just leave it at that.........



\

Things that make you go Hmmm......

Hello, Citizen.


Let me preface this Post with a caveat; that being, though I do possess an ideology (and really who doesn't) it is not my intent to be overtly politically motivated.


What does motivate me however, is the basic principles of society and commonwealth , and by that I mean the daily stuff that gets on your nerves and makes you wonder "says Who?"


Take for instance young Fern.


This young lady, sells eggs, and her fondest wish was for her own camera. The lure of the Disney Princess 3.0 mega pixel point and shoot digital, with three inter-changeable face plates depicting a different Princess was indeed great and she saved until she had the needed twenty dollars.


A princely sum, to be sure.


Everything was cool until Dad got involved; that is installing the interactive multimedia software that Windows wouldn't recognize. Sucks to be nine and have to return your stuff to Wal-Mart just because apparently the slackers who programmed it left out something vital.

In all she keeps her chin up, sorely disappointed , but she knows the drill right?


I felt proud of her, exchanging her merchandise receiving her cash, and putting it in her purse. Meanwhile Dad is lurking about, thinking what good training this is until.......


The Clerk Asks For Her Signature.


Now, I ask you why does the largest retailer in the Known World need my daughters signature?

(Actually, I asked The Clerk this)


I have this theory/suspicion that most people will do what you ask of them, especially if you are in uniform ( and apparently little blue smocks with smiley faces qualify for uniform status).


Poor little Fern, my sweet, is standing poised, pen in hand, when I drop this 'bomb'. I get blank stares all around. Mom, Fern, The Clerk, Key Holder and Supreme Commander of Wal-Mart Checkout, and the smiley face are all wondering the same thing.


What?


I mean who cares? Who cares that she's a minor? Who cares that no signature issued by her can be valid. Ever. Who cares that this so-called necessary signature must be handled by HER PARENTS.

The Transaction must go on.

Key Holder is trying to pretend she didn't hear the question. Apparently the mauve vest does give her authority over blue vests and gullible Citizens, it does not have printed on the polyester label any answers to legitimate questions. She looks a Smiley Face. Smiley Face says "Have a Nice Day."


The Clerk sees Key holder consulting her navel, and assumes command.

"She has to sign to show she received the money!" Bright smile on her face, but her eyes say,"succumb to the power vested in me by this blue, um, vest and go away"


Time for the Big Question.

If it doesn't matter if the signature is valid, why do you need one at all?


The Clerk, seeing her polyester authority provides no protection, stammers
"well no kid could ever return things then!"


Now its my turn to smile big, but my eyes say " No Shit,Sherlock".

By now, Key Holder is fishing for her Mace, Agent K has four kids gathered up-wind and Fern has signed the worthless document anyway.


As we walk to our awaiting Suburban, I lose some of my self confidence. For some reason, I need affirmation from someone I respect.


I turn to K and ask, "was I out of line there?"
"no" She says," thank you! Some people never think about what they do; or why."


I think old Smiley Face had it right.....



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My Fellow Americans.......

Special Agent Dick Daring reporting in--

Ok Citizens, Listen up!


Having delved into the unrestricted confines (yes Mrs. O'Fallon; that is an oxymoron) of the Blogosphere, I have a clear, vivid picture of what this Blog can be...


Smart, witty and articulate. (Any resemblance to racist innuendo is incidental and anyway I didn't claim it was 'clean').


Properly composed, spelled and punctuated. (Thanks again, Mrs O'Fallon)


Chock full 'o' irony, Penny ante wisdom and other semi solid misconceptions.


Drawn from the inexhaustible well of things that interest ME! That's right Citizens, no more pandering to the masses, no more blogosphereical pretense, this forum will contain..... well, um... content.


Being new to the phenomena, I undertook blogging as an exercise in prosaic voyeurism, and to that end I have posted a handful of offerings so that I could stretch the creative part in me that strives to communicate well, and hoping others would appreciate my contributions.


Truly, the Lure of Comments is seductive, and I fear I became too easily ensnared by the siren call of dialogue. Heady stuff, indeed, to have peers and even strangers read your words and offer their own in return!


However, I look back at my Blog, and I find one post, the post that most aptly aligns with my values and aspirations, languishing in obscurity!


None but my dearest friend thought it worthy of note; and her with a glaring and admitted bias!


So with no more pontification, I resolve to dedicate this Blog the pursuit of intellectual honesty and liberty, mulling over the human condition and its accouterments.

Here, is a sample----


I recently had a discussion with my good friend, the En-Gen-Er, about the institution of capitalism. My point was to question the long term sustainability of our culture. The En-Gen-Er was atypically blunt in his response, like what else works?


Answer: Nothing I know of!


Can friends speak of such matters and remain long tethered by their friendship?


Can my dear sister tolerate my questioning the Governments ability to trample liberty, even if the goal is to protect children?


For me- I will question everything,and in turn be questioned by all. My opinions must stand the scrutiny of contrary opinion before they can be held in confidence.


"I have sworn on the Altar of God, Eternal hostility to every form of Tyranny over the minds of man." Thomas Jefferson

Pillow Talk

to: Agent K

re: Blog traffic

Darling, since you are the only person who reads/comments on/knows about my blog, It appears as if this has become a forum wherein we can observe facets of our personalities and publish our pathos in a medium suitable for introspection!


to: Dick Daring

re: your Blog


Honey- I'm sorry you don't have any traffic on your Blog, I'm sure no-one knows where to find it, or that you are even in the Blogosphere. Try and get some sleep, I'm sure you will be inspired to blog something wonderful to-morrow.


to: Agent K

re: wonderful blog

YOU have a wonderful blog, I have a under represented, apparently dis interesting personal perspective piece that serves only to poke irritating pinholes in my ego. The only bright spot is your feedback and the encouragement it gives me.


to: Dick Daring

re: Encouragement

Let me encourage you to stop over thinking this. In fact let me encourage you not to think about it at all! This correspondence is getting tiresome and I don't feel like listening to you whine anymore!

to:Agent K

re:Whining

I wouldn't have to whine if I could whip out a witty entertaining stream-of-consciousness piece of prose that captured the imagination of readers all across the world who tuned in and shared in a forum of co-dependent anonymity!


to: Dick Daring

re: Stream of Consciousness

Don't you have to go to work tomorrow? Maybe you should go to sleep.


to: Agent K

re: Work

Your right! I just need to work on my delivery! If I polish my thoughts, and break out my thesaurus and provide the reader with something refreshing, then they will seek out MY Blog and I will feel as if my efforts are appreciated! I'll start to-morrow, call in sick no-QUIT MY JOB ! Then I can have full time access to your blogging prowess! Yes- it will be a wonderful example to the children, why just yesterday was I not telling Headstrong Boy that " Your best effort requires total concentration"? I am Inspired! thank you Darling, for saving me from the depths of despair-and a lifetime of drudgery,plugging away at a stable,well paid,uninspiring job! I could go on and on.....


to: Dick Daring


re:concentration


ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ



to:Agent K

re: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ



Honey? Sweety are you awake?

Do You Believe.....

Is everything truly grey? Does every person need to be free to chose? What choices are Right? Wrong? Is there such a thing? Where is YOUR line? At what point do you step across from Knowing your 'rights' to Asserting them?

Do you understand that the surest way to be free from discord is to acquiesce to the demands of Tyranny? Do you yearn for 'peace in your time'? Do you feel sometimes that your prerogatives are suspended to ease the advancement of another's? What makes their needs/wants/whims more valid than yours?

Are you one to go quietly into that dark night, or would you fight,FIGHT against the dying of the Light?

To whom have you given Authority over your Liberty? Was it given freely? Did you feel coerced by the spectre of polite society? Did you give up your supporting part in the war, for a lead role in a cage?

Tell me, Citizen, are you free? Is your liberty valued? Was it bought at great price? Is it precious? Do you advertise your freedom? Does your sign say 'Play Nice', or 'Don't Tread on Me'?

Per your request....

OK-so I wasn't real sure how my blog would fly with the ever so talented and witty circles my Farm K-Agent Chick runs with; but your comments are so nice and supportive, I just can't help but fish for more!


I have only one teeny issue- I'm under strict orders not to wield this forum as a place of incessant whining and belittling of others. ( I must use my powers for good' you see.)


Since so much of my own sense of humor stems from people watching and then parsing their behavior in humorous and cynical repertory, I find only the mundane and amusing facets of my life and that of my children. Oh how the knife cuts deep when turned inward!


Seriously, (that comma took me six key strokes to find, 'delete ;delete /delete) several years ago I found myself in a new occupation and learning a whole new set of ropes. This included Asphalt, Graders, Dump Trucks; and tricky stuff like 'blending the residual, and marrying that up, applying 'Release Agent and 'Scraping tapers'. This is all manly,manly,manly stuff and I felt I was learning from the Undisputed Leaders of Road Construction Experience.


Wrong.


I found myself transported back to Jr. High. (middle school, 7th to 9th Grade, Seventeenth Level of Hell, whatever they call it in your town.) These guys bickered over hand tools. They got cranky over tiny imperfections in a three hundred ton asphalt patch. They pitched fits over lunch boxes, and whose went where and was taking to much space and 'accidentally run over'.


They leveled accusations, cast aspersions, and sniped at each other behind turned backs.



Well, I tell you, Citizen (Hey Farm Suite, can I use commas like that?) I engaged in ridiculing my fellow worker along wid'em for a spell.


But then I thought to my self "Self, anyone who would belittle that guy when he's not around would surely cut into you when you're gone too!"



As far as I'm concerned, anything said behind my back is none of my business and I was content to leave it at that; however my sense of decency crept back and I chose the high road. The don't say anything that isn't uplifting and profitable for the other guy, road.


This is a road that leads from constant banter and humorous camaraderie to silence, awkwardness and isolation.


Thankfully I found out there were others who shared my sentiment and we all now commiserate in peace.By ourselves,mostly.In our air conditioned dump trucks. Hauling the 300 degree asphalt to our still squabbling(skwable?) co-workers to dump, spread,rake,marry-up, and apply release agent to.


Hmmm. I wonder if they know I can't hear them bitch behind my back, up here on the High Road? I think I'll just roll the window up, and keep the heat out.

Special Agent Dick Daring reporting in.....

I'm not sure how to go about this blog deal----posting everyday of my life would be quite droll and also a huge waste of any potential readers time.


Just this once I will give an account of my day and since every day is so much like the last, it should suffice in perpetuity.



Highlight of the day--waking up with Agent K. Could've been any number of a million guys but that privilege is all mine. (Suckers!)



Not so great highlight of the day? Dragging my carcass out of the sack and heading off in my never ending search for the legal tender.



As usual, The Agency has some fantastic and exciting task for me to perform you know, the kind of stuff that I could tell you all about but since this is on the Web and there is sooooooo much creepiness on said Web I choose to limit personal info. Incognito, right?


Yeah I'm paranoid.


Never forget, Citizens, just because Your paranoid, doesn't mean Their not out to get you!




Anyway. upon retuning to The Lair, Agent K gets called on an important mission and I am in charge. Of four kids. Alone. I'm trying to make a big deal about that but really, it's no sweat and my kids are great most of the time and when they aren't, let's just say I am trained in counter insurgency techniques and counter revolutionary tactics.



So, I got up, went to work, saw my Lovely for a short while and then watched my kids until bedtime so she could go out for 'Girl Time' with her friend.


And you wonder why they call me Daring?

Dick Danger Blog Launch

Um-Hi.... I started this blog so that I could make comments on my wife's blog and also on those of her co conspirators. Previously I would use her Blog identity and that was obviously quite lame, so here I am, on the Blogosphere!


Any one who Knows me will also know why I call this the Replacers- But you don't know me- I'm incognito! (hence the secret agent code name 'Dick Daring')



Lets just say that moving Twelve times in fourteen years of otherwise blissful marriage qualifies my family as Re -Placed.



I would post pictures of each new place, cataloguing all the different Places Ive lived, but that would not be in the spirit of incognitoness and would also arouse the Ire of Agent K. Suffice it to say we have suffered the arrows of outrageous fortune and some of them resemble a 30 foot travel trailer, crappy low budget shacks and public housing.



Thankfully, those days are behind us and the Agency has given us a new mission--an out of town two acre piece of heaven suitable for growing kids, chickens, blackberries and poison oak!


This would be a great segue into more pics but that is Agent K's territory and I wont intrude tonite.